The clock at 185

You'd think I'd know by now. Been a regular for about three years.

The clock at Club 185 runs 10 minutes late. This didn't stop me from making a mad dash to get back to work for a 1:15 p.m. call. I left lunch at 12:46 p.m. About 14 minutes before I'd normally leave.

Great lunch with The Old Man, The Mayor, Godsmack and The Godfather. I'd love to see a political television show with Smack and The Mayor. They entertain. The Godfather could be the third man ... like off camera and the camera just pans to him for reactions.

That's a great idea.

- From the desk of Art McGregor

They play music at grocery stores

By ART MCGREGOR
Blog on the Run editor

I've eaten lunch at the Giant Eagle Hot Food Bar on Steltzer Road about 14 or 15 times in September. Just noticed something today.

They play music in grocery stores. I hadn't really noticed this since I worked at a Big Eagle in the summer of 1995.

I dig the tunes! In our Columbus market, the music they play is a combination of Sunny 95 (94.7 FM) and Mix 97 (97.1 FM). A more pumped-up version of adult contemporary. I approve. Today they had Annie Lennox's "Sweet Dreams."

The lyric "everybody's looking for something" really means something in a grocery store. Everybody in there is looking for something.

Except me in the summer of 1995. I was looking for nothing.

I worked about 18 hours a week and they were the worst 18 hours of the week. I made something like $65 a week. I got paid every two weeks. I was forced to be in a union. That was awesome. Thanks unions. I really got my money's worth.

I usually worked three or four days a week. My least favorite shift was the 5 p.m. to 10:30 p.m. shift. I'd have to miss the Tribe games! This was before cell phones. Sometimes my mom would come in and tell me the scores. I also always had to work the shitastic Sunday noon to 8:30 p.m. shift and Saturday's from like 2:30 p.m. to 8 p.m. I hated it. I lived about .8 miles from the store. I'd walk there (drive if raining).

I led the league in "giving up shifts." If you wanted to pick up extra hours, I was the guy to see. I would dress in my work outfit, knowing full well I wasn't working and stay away from the house for five hours. Hopefully my mom wouldn't be shopping that night. I took chances.

I'd go see movies or play softball and what not. I finally quit in early September of 1995. I called off sick on my last day. (Of course I did.)

Longest three months of my fucking life.

If you remember college football, it was the time Michigan scored 18-unanswered points in the fourth quarter and beat Virginia 18-17 on the game's final play. I had to be at work at 4 p.m. and there was no way in hell I was missing the end of the game.

The song they played on the grocery store station that summer at least 30 times a day was Rusted Root's "Send me on My Way." They never had a DJ. Just songs 24/7. I don't know how they came up with song orders. I was too busy bagging groceries.

Then again, who am I to disagree?

Not 'Short' on ugly old ladies

(Short North street walker taking a rest)

By ART MCGREGOR
Blog on the Run editor

Whenever you hear someone say the word "misconception" they usually follow it with a positive anecdote about the subject of the "misconception."

(i.e. You know, a lot of people think that McDonald's in the German Village has shitty service and it takes 21 minutes in the drive-thru lane to get two hash browns and an orange juice. That's a misconception. The service is great! I went and it only took me nine minutes and no cars were in front of me!)

Monkey wrench time.

There's a misconception around Columbus that the Short North is the home of the good looking and well-to-do. Well, maybe there's a lot of well-to-do people.

Dude there are some serious trolls walking around that area of town. The Short North has far more weirdo-looking people than the German Village. Go eat lunch at Betty's in a window seat facing High Street at around noon.

Think about it ... do you ever see the homeless strange when eating at the Mohawk or Club 185? (OK, you do have a point about the High Beck. ... And that is on High Street so that kind of blows my entire argument.)

I have never seen so many 80-something homeless, looking old ladies. The males seemed to top out around the age of 73.

It's probably harder being a homeless woman, so I'm surprised they live longer.

At least they do in the Short North.

Lunch at Panera (campus)

I want to stay as close to the edge as I can without going over. Out on the edge you see all kinds of things you can't see from the center. - Kurt Vonnegut

(Artist's rendition of girl)

By ART MCGREGOR
Blog on the Run editor

Special props to the girl stunning stunning AND sunning around noon today on the roof top over at 126 E. Chittenden Ave. Made my first campus lunch visit in more than a month. Don't ever want to have to say that again. In campus terms, campus is dead in the summer but there's more than just a few examples of the living dead in the south campus area. They fuckin' look better than the George A. Romero version.

(not so much)

The EGG's outdoor patio was bumping. A near perfect afternoon and at least seven or eight parties enjoying below average food and shitty service on a splendid Tuesday.

For those not on or around a college campus often, there's no way to describe the amount of weirdos that circulate the Ivory Tower. These aren't even the homeless bums or bums in general. They're like women in their late 40s, early 50s that look haggard and college-professored out. They walk around in weird clothes and tote bags and likely have five or six cats at home. They all are moderately thin with stringy, frizzy dark hair. They talk as if every phrase they say is the most interesting tidbit of information to ever infect the 43210.

Thing is, these women are always around. It's just students, like the lovely sun bather above in the swim suit, usually are around to drown them off. I noticed a similar epidemic in my first summer-go-round in the campus area in 1999. Kept seeing the bums, just stopped seeing the finely sculpted ass checks. That's not crackin'.

I guess the bums have blended in for me in the past decade. With fashion and facial hair styles, it's tough to differentiate between the bums and the asses. Hell, my favorite bum probably isn't even a bum. That's Bear. Bear is the greatest person to ever go into the EGG. Got a ratty beard, white man's afro, zubaz pants, various plastic bags, etc. He kinda looks like Kurt Vonnegut.

(Bear - without beard)

But these women, maybe best described as rejects from a Hillary Clinton rally, are still everywhere. Parking cars, crossing the street, going into used book stores, taking four hours to order a sandwich at Panera. They're everywhere.

Sadly, the girl on the roof went inside when I drove past her again.

See ya in less than a month.

11A. ENTRADA

By ART MCGREGOR
Blog on the Run editor

Just got back from a lunch at El Vaquero. Didn't realize it pretty much only is an Ohio restaurant. There are some locations in Toledo and Michigan.

One thing really enthused me about the Gahanna location. On television they were showing ESPN DEPORTES. Baseball highlights in Spanish! That's awesome and makes total sense. Mexican restaurants should be showing that shit during the daytime. Even at night! It adds to the ambiance.

As some that have read me for some time know, I hate when bars just blindly put on ESPN and ESPN2. It makes no sense in this age and day where regionalized sports networks have the mostest bevy of the live sports coverage in the summer months. Bar Louie is the worst at this practice. Ever go in there on a Friday night? Not that I have recently, but you'll find "Baseball Tonight" (on mute) and "World Series of Poker" reruns on until they serve their last Bud Light. Fuckin' turn on STO or FSN Kentucky. Hell, pony up and get the baseball package - Eddie George Grill stlyes. (ALSO, why the fuck do some places throw an E on the end of grill?)

You can pretty much put an e on any wordd that ends in a double consonant. The last name Clarke also plays with this phenomenon. I have no idea how to spell the last word in the previous sentence. And it doesn't even end in an e. That I know of.

Well, lunch was tasty. You can't go wrong with that place. My bill today? $7.39. I know a guy who once at $17 of food there. That's a lot.

I'm still more excited about the channel they showed, however. The one that begins with an E.