INFIELD IN ON THE CORNERS!!!!!!

We struggled at softball on Thursday night. We fell 17-6 in a shortened five-inning game. This means we were "run ruled" and forced to quit. I only post quickly after the games when we win. I wait four days between losses.

I made two errors in my brief stint at first base and our shortstop, The Skipper, shouted for the mid-inning position change.

His 92-MPH rocket balls from his position against a glaring sun, had nothing to do with our problems at first base throughout the game. He seemed to take Thursday's game with more seriousness than any previous game. More serious than any player in the Eastern Men's Rec League history. Maybe he had a serious problem with DOA, the team that obliterated us with about 25 base hits in five innings. But good thing The Skipper ordered us to play infield in ... in a softball game ... with no outs and runners on first and third in the second inning of a 3-2 game. I don't know about that decision. I think you just go for the single out there considering the team we played had tons of tattoos and seriously hit every ball on a frozen rope. The Godfather noticed and commented on The Skipper's managerial style on the GVM post-game radio show.



The good thing about the position change was that I got to play in the outfield next to McCampus. I said this to our buddy, "I'd hate to play against you." The guy doesn't shut up in mocking the other team with chants of "nice BB!" and "way to watch those pitches go by and walk!" All were funny.

I did some good things with the bat, collecting another RBI and actually getting a hit to the outfield. Finished 1 for 2, with an RBI and run scored on this night. This is big news for a slappy hitter like myself. As you would imagine, I'd probably be a total wuss in fights and likely just try to slap the other person while cowering into a fetal position.

We're not playing this week but will have our last game on Thursday, July 31. That means the season stretched from April to August and we played nine games. What is this? Major League Lacrosse?

We're 2-5-1 now. We'd be contending in the National League West.

- From the desk of Art McGregor

Phone calls are so '90s

Just got off the phone with The Sports Writer. He's in Maumee, Ohio right now and heading down here to heckle former school mates "Pole and Tee R at softball." He probably won't do that but he's getting into town around 8 p.m. Thursday. He lost his cell phone in Lake Michigan over the weekend and we've since had to actually talk on the phone which is so gayness anymore.

He dropped these doozies:

On former girlfriend going through a tough time:

"I was nice. I was helping her through it. Mostly I was just distancing myself."

On TV reporters:

"That's the thing about TV reporters. They're all incredibly insecure. It's great. Got myself an Asian. They're all mostly minorities, too. Cross that off the list. I didn't lay down as much pipe as I should have but I got out of there without chlamydia."

- From the desk of Art McGregor

Moose Knuckle tightens but holds on

GVM Moose Knuckle improved to 2-4-1 with a 17-16 win tonight over Heavy Hitters in Berliner Park.

The Knuckle took a 17-11 lead into the bottom of the seventh and needed a force out at third with two outs in the final frame to capture the win.

All 10 players collected an RBI in the win.

- From the desk of Art McGregor

Dynomite

(Each morning we'll have an "About Last Night" post.)

With the 19th pick in the NBA Draft, the Cleveland LeBrons Cavaliers selected J.J. Hickson (N.C. State) to add "some youth to their front line." I'm glad they went with youth in the draft. Rarely does a team that drafts a 44-year old reap any benefits. Credit Danny Ferry. He found youth in this draft. Like a needle in a hay stack. Hickson won't turn 20 until September. (Jimmie Walker turned 61 this past Wednesday.)

mistertrendy and I were not too pleased with the selection. (We had no thoughts - negative or positive - on Jimmie Walker's birthday as we didn't know what day it was on.) Still judging from trendy's "If we take Kosta Koufous, I will fall out of my chair" text, he's got to be happy the Cavs didn't select the Ohio State attendee.

My initial reaction: "He's 6-foot-9? This guy sucks. He is a nerd. He will miss so many easy shots next year. He is a guy who misses a lot of shots."

trendy's: "No shit. Fuck. Why not Arthur or Douglas-Roberts? Fuckin' Ferry!"

In related news:

"Koufos' teammates, Othello Hunter and Jamar Butler of Lima, were not drafted."

I've always said that guys like Jamar Butler and before his time, Brent Darby, deserve to play six years in college.

The Indians moved into a tie for last place (yes!) with a thrilling 4-1 win over the powerhouse San Francisco Giants. These are not the same Giants who won the Super Bowl. These guys are in last place. They might be Giants, but they don't play like it. Cliff Lee, again magnificent, struck out 11 in eight innings.

Rain/lightning/thunder did away with our softball game last night. We've had four rainouts on the season and played one game in the month of June. Does it rain anywhere else in the world?

Comfest begins this afternoon. Our boys Hotel War play today at 1:20 p.m. on one of the stages (UPDATE: It's the "offramp.") I can't wait to see what "socially concious" message they have on the giant cups this year. And then I'll put duct tape over it. (But not the top of the cup. That would make it difficult to drink.)

- Compiled by Art McGregor